I just have to say again how blessed I feel....and how thankful I am for feeling this way. Looking back, I know that a year ago I was not happy....didn't know what happiness was anymore. I smiled and went through the motions of behaving the way a "happy person" should. In reality, I was miserable and didn't know how to fix myself.
Eight months ago I found the source of my happiness.....I found God and His amazing grace...and He reached inside and fixed my heart. Then I began to learn and grow and develop a relationship with my God. I was like a toddler learning to walk....God the Father held out His hands to me and urged me to come toward Him. I've stumbled and fallen.....cried out in sorrow and grief...and He was there to pick me up.
I learned to walk....to pray...to trust...to be happy with myself......and to have a desire in my heart to be the person, the woman God wants me to be. I am a work in progress for sure! But today, a co-worker commented that she was so glad to see me smiling again and to know I was happy. That meant a lot. Because I pretended 'happiness' for so long, it was an affirmation of sorts for someone else to recognize that I was happy in a real and true sense of the word..
Its been a long time coming.....thank you God for showing me the way.