Glacier National Park 2010

Saturday, April 5, 2008

Initial Ideas

I've toyed with the idea of blogging for a while but lacked the courage to actually do so. Sharing my thoughts with those I know has always been intimidating. And now I want to share with people I haven't even met? Somehow that avenue seems safer.....isn't that funny?

Recently people and events contrived to take away my most private of joys.....journaling. To have my most intimate thoughts used as a weapon against me was most painful. For some time I was unable to write....fearing the repercussions. Those who liken the freedom to express one's thoughts through the written word to something akin to breathing will understand my pain and my loss.

However, I could not let the wounding ways of others take away my one avenue of working through complex problems or the madness of everyday living. Somehow I managed to find the courage to reclaim my right. And now I find myself grappling with decisions which will effect me and those I love for a long time to come. Perhaps the comments from others will give me the strength to attempt the things I've longed to try. Maybe my dreams for the future will return on the ideas of others.

My future without dreams seems a dismal place.

Welcome to my ramblings!

11 comments:

Relaxin' with Books said...

I am glad that you are back in the saddle, so to speak. Writing has always been one of your best outlets and I was sorry to see you lose it. I can't wait to see what is to come.

Nsquared said...

Thanks Relaxin'! Your comments encourage me to keep writing. I am with you in that I can't wait to see what is to come! Having been deprived of my dreams once before I am that much more determined to see them fulfilled.

Nsquared said...

I read a wonderful book called A Writer's Book of Days several years ago. The author encouraged those of us who write to make a habit of writing every day in order to develop our craft. She included prompts for every day of the year. I think it would be great to include prompts in my blog to encourage the development of ideas.
It would be nice if others would us the prompts as well.....then we could have an opportunity to share our unique perspectives through our random ramblings.

Relaxin' with Books said...

So give us a prompt...

Nsquared said...

Here's the first prompt.....write about a place which fills you with peace and hope. May be past, present, or future. I'm eager to read your responses.

Relaxin' with Books said...

I have been thinking about this all day. Lots of things fill me with peace. Lots of things give me hope. But both together really narrow it down.

My piece of land out in the country is far back from the road. I can't hear the traffic but I can hear the whisper of the breeze through the trees and the quiet gurgle of water.

Driving through the gate I leave the world and my problems behind. As the gravel crunches under the car tires, I glance out the car window at the wild flowers we planted years ago along the edge of a very new road. Now they are truly wild, coming back each year to remind us of the plans we have for the future. I dip into the low bottom and ease back up and into the curve. The citrus and plum and peach and pear trees come into view. They are kind of scraggly but make me smile. We are determined to have an orchard even if the sandy soil does not want to cooperate.

As the road squeezes back through the woods at the other end of the orchard, the loop comes into view. No easy straight paths for me. I have to have surprises. The road curves into an oval that meets back with the pinch through the woods.

As you round the oval, the house site comes into view and my smile widens. I can see the house as clear as if it were really there. The cottage style house is two stories with dormers poking from the roof. The windows are wide open to catch the breeze blowing through the trees. I walk around to the back of the house. I can see myself in front of the huge second story window painting at an easel. I can look down the slope and see the muddy water flowing through the deep sides of the creek. There is new inspiration every day right outside my window. I smile again.

I walk down the slope to the creek all the while keeping a eye open for visitors, some welcome, some not so much. The possums, birds, squirrels, and deer I don't mind so much. I like to steer clear of the snakes. If I stay out of their way, I figure they will stay out of mine.

I continue to the muddy creek bank and jump a little side creek. Now I am on an island. The rest of the world has disappeared. I make my way to my favorite tree that leans over the creek. I carefully slide along the trunk until my feet are dangling over the slow moving water. I pull a book out of my pocket and settle in.

Now, I have my own little piece of heaven. All is right with the world.

Relaxin' with Books said...

That was kind of cool. I didn't know I had that many words inside of me.

Nsquared said...

Well Relaxin',how does it feel to get your feet wet, so to speak? Although I've never seen your piece of land I feel as if I've been there. Thanks for taking that first BIG step of sharing your writing. It can be a scary thing. I look forward to reading more from you.
My prompts from now on will be listed by Prompt #....... Enjoy!

Relaxin' with Books said...

It was scary! Putting pencil to paper has always been hard for me. Thanks for getting me started. :-)

thesunshinegirl said...

so here I am...not as deeply ensconced in the world of the written word as you. But I will try as time allows, and my mood evokes what is within to come out by the use of a keyboard and not my mouth!!!

Nsquared said...

Welcome sunshinegirl! We all have words within us.....we're just hesitant to pull them out. No hesitancy allowed here....just let 'em flow.....there will be no "grades" given and no tests to study for....sharing and absorbing the thoughts and ideas of others. Hopefully we can all grow and encourage each other to reach those dreams we've never thought possible.