Last night, for the first time in a relatively long time, the fibro monster reared its ugly head.....and sleep did not come easy. As a result today was difficult for me....the pain was one issue I dealt with along with children anxious for school to be OVER....and rescheduled grade level projects.....my world is topsy turvy.
And at a time when I should be filled with joy at all the good things in my life, I feel depression tugging at my coat tails......maybe depression is the wrong word. Quite suddenly I feel no sense of purpose in my life......I find myself questioning whether I am in the right profession? Am I impacting my students in a positive way? Perhaps there is another field where I might do more good......but I cannot imagine switching careers at my age........and so my thoughts went today.
It is highly probable that these thoughts are simply the result of fitful sleep and the resulting pain. I have no time for pain....it slows me....it slows my life....it attempts to limit what I want to accomplish with the time I have left......and that angers me.