I don't usually do this....but my thoughts today are kind of tied to my last post. It's like this.....as I've mentioned before I struggle with fibromyalgia......was diagnosed years ago when there were still doctors telling people their particular symptoms were "all in their head." There isn't a day that goes by I don't have pain.....some days its easily managed because I'm so used to it being there. Other days...not so much. Some days it rears up like an angry fire breathing dragon refusing to be conquered or ignored. Such has been the case over the past couple of weeks.
Today the pain was a dragon. And I didn't know how I was going to make it through the day....not going to work isn't really an option anymore because I have NO sick days left....if I don't work I don't get paid. It would have been so easy to throw myself a good old fashioned "pity party".....and I almost did. Then I remembered the song.
I had pulled into my parking place at work.....it was raining, of course....and I sat huddled in my seat trying to gather the strength to walk into the building. I kind of muttered a prayer under my breath....something to the effect of , "help me God 'cause I just don't have it in me to do this." And then I thought of the song.
"This is the day the Lord hath made, we will rejoice and be glad in it."
This rain soaked, pain filled day was made by God.....and I needed to "rejoice and be glad in it?" Have I mentioned that I sometimes have problems with this part? As I made my way across the parking lot and into the school I did some thinking about how I was going to "rejoice" in this day. The first thought which popped into my frazzled brain was....."I am alive so thank you God for that."
I can rejoice because I have a job I love.....I can rejoice because the people I work with make our school a great place to be.....I can rejoice because I get to interact with children every day.....I can rejoice because I know what I do can make a difference in someone's life.....and the list went on. Every time the pain threatened to overwhelm me I would "rejoice" about someone or something. It didn't matter. The bottom line became, I am where I am because God has a plan......and His plan for me IS perfect. Before I realized it, my day at work was done....I had made it through.
The pain is still with me.....but now I know I can "rejoice and be glad" through the pain! The dragon hasn't been conquered...yet....but I have learned I can be joyful regardless of my physical state. Now, I think I will curl up in my chair and enjoy some "quiet time" with God.....I want to tell Him about my day....and say thank you once again.