Today was a day of contemplation. It has become apparent that I may be one of those people who lives life as a single from this point on. I was divorced after 29 years of marriage...a marriage where I was very often lonely....except for the company of my 3 precious children. It was sad that I could feel loneliness even when surrounded by my family. Being lonely is not synonymous with being alone.
That was 5 years ago. After the events and upheavals of the past few weeks, through my prayer time I've come to see that being alone/single may be exactly where God wants me to be. And I'm learning to accept that. To be honest, I don't like it much. But I like being hurt even less. For me at least, that has been the outcome every time. The only One I can trust to really love me is God.
Living single doesn't mean that I am content to sit back and let life pass me by. It means that I can hear God more clearly.....strive to be in His will more completely.....and I can enjoy the world He created more thoroughly. There are still many adventures to experience....so many new things to learn...so many new friends to meet. I honestly believe God has a perfect plan for me and that there are missions/jobs that He has only for me....and I plan to be willing and available....even if it means I'm dancing all by myself.